With a reverence for the 1970s classic (old) TV show Alice, Mitt Tomney honored Florence “Flo” Jean Castleberry as played by Polly Holiday as he drawled “Kiss my Grits”. This was after a stunning 3rd place defeat and/or closer than expected third place finish (to Rick Satanorum) in the Alabama and Mississippi primaries. Prior to the election Tomney had stuffed down a record amount of cheesy grits in a performance worthy of champion eater Takeru Kobayashi. Tomney was heard whispering to his wife, “What am I doing to my self? I didn’t accumulate a quarter of a $Billion to dine on grits.
This reminded Tom of his adventure driving from a culturally isolated town in Wisconsin to Ft. Benning Georgia. The waitress asked “Hun, do you want toast or grits/” Not knowing what grits were and thinking they are probably a regional equivalent of Captain Crunch, Tom said Grits. Well. “Kiss my Grits”
BREAKING NEWS: Newtron tom said his poor showing in neighboring states just proves that all other candidates should drop out and he will be a winner. Tom is a classic (old).