Although I am almost immobilized by the speculation that Jessica Simpson may be pregnant again, I find myself compelled to think about the state of my favorite Dictators.
Some might fear that 2012 was a bad year as our beloved Zine el Abidine Ben-Ali of Tunisia, Hosni Mubarak of Egypt and tragically fashion forward leader Muammar Al-Gaddifi of Libia.
But the real good news is that Dictators have discovered that they don’t need 97+ % of the vote anymore. They can establish or continue dictatorships with a mere 50%+ 1 of the vote. The ballot box was kind to Dictators Hugo Chavez, Barack (Gotta Love Executive Orders, Smart Regulations and Drones) Obama, Vladimir Putin and Mohammad Morsi this year.
Dictator of the Year honors has to go to Basher al-Assad of Syria. While he showed potential in 2011, 2012 was indeed his breakout year demonstrating that you don’t need to look strong to be a strongman.
The other piece of good news is that the bench of Dictators is extremely strong, headed by Kim Jong-Eun Leader/Hair Stylist of Korea, Atifete of Kosovo, Raul Castro of Cuba, Mahmoud AhmadiNejad of Iran, Hamid Karzai of Afghanistan, Aleksandr Lukashenko of Belarus, Liham Aliev of Azerbaijan, Hamad bin Isa Al Khalifa of Bahrain, Gurbanguly Berdimuhamedov of Turkmenistan, Ismail Omar Guelieh of Djibouti, Emomalii Rahrmon of Tajikistan, Nursultan Naxarbaev of Kazakhstan, Girme Wolde Giorgis of Ethiopia, Islam Karimov of Uzbekistan, Hu Jintao/ Xi Jinping of China, Albert-Bernard Bongo of Gabon, Choummaly Sayasone of Laos, Norodom Sihamoui of Cambodia, Thein Sein of Myanmar, Abdullah II bin-Al Hussein of Jordan, Nguyen Minh Triet of Viet nam, Haji Hassa ai Waddaulah of Brunei, Qaboos bin Said Al-Said of Omar, Laurent Gbagbo of Gote d’Ivoire, Abdelaziz Bouteflika of Algeria, Lansana Conte of Guinea, Al Thani of Qatar, Khalifa Al Nahyau of UAE, Idriss Deby of Chad, Paul Biya of Cameron, Omar H. A. Al-Bashier of Sudan, Ali Abdallah Salih of Yemen, Isaias Afweuki of Eritea, Obiang Mbusogo of Equat. Guinea, Abdullah Yusaf Ahmed of Somalia, Robert Mugabe of Zimbabwe, Joseph Kabila of Congo, Paul Kagame of Rwanda, Jose Eduardo dos Santos of Angola, Mswati III of Swaziland and last but not least Tom of TomVille.
What Dictators will fall in 2013 and which ones will star? Vote early and often.