Tom announces “Truth According to Tom” Premium with multiple pay walls

Taking a cue from the New York Times, Los Angeles Times, Washington Post, TomVille Irregular Bugle, MSN, TurboTax and countless others, Tom announced the ultimate “bait and switch” with new pay walls for premium editions of Truth According to Tom.

In the free edition, Tom will offer multiple stories on already over-hyped in your face celebrities such as LaTom James, Barack O’TomA, Tiger Woody, Charlie Sheen, Hillary Clinton, Hosni Mubarak and Tom.

For an additional fee, readers may enjoy Truth According to Tom Premium Gold.  This edition will feature style and fashion icons such as Kim Jong II, Kim Jong Eun, Col. Moammar Gaddafi, Steve Jobs,  and Hosni Mubarak plus tired celebrities such as Kim Kardashian, Justin Bieber, Mark Zuckerberg,  and Tom.

Finally there is the Truth According to Tom Premium Gold Platinum Edition devoted exclusively to America’s darling Lindsay Lohan.

“Who needs advertisers?” pronounced a drooling Tom.  “We have cracked the Rubik’s Cube of monetizing the Internet.

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2 Responses to Tom announces “Truth According to Tom” Premium with multiple pay walls

  1. Um … I’d sign up for the titanium … er .. plutonium … uh … whatever the top level is, but I’m more broke than the Federal Government. Don’t suppose there’s a super-secret “fellow blogger from Chicago” free introductory rate? Maybe even, with an introductory time limit of, like, forever? 😉

    • tom says:

      Actually, you may be in luck. We have established a “scholarshp” program supported by guilty, liberal Hollywood celebs who will fund your Super Premium Gold Pattinum Uranium enriched membership so you can keep up with their comings and goings.

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