A heroic, but defeated General Tom has called Commander-In-Chief Barack O’TomA to officially advise him of the obvious. We have been defeated at the border by unaccompanied minor children crossing into the country. The battle has been long and hard, but even Tom couldn’t take listening to 170,000 + whining children and surrendered. Before his resignation, General Tom performed an act of bravery and heroism surely worthy of the Congressional Medal of Honor. He sacrificed his body and risked his life by jumping on a ready to explode diaper. This act of bravery may have saved the lives of the entire INS bureaucracy.
Barack O’TomA has already implemented his contingency play to spend another $2 Billion + on the problem and also will install former Veterans Administration Secretary General Eric Shinseki to lead the battle.