Tag Archives: Football

TomVille State University announces new Tom Studies program

TomVille State University (TSU) proudly announced their new Tom Studies (TS) program in their world famous School of Hard Knocks.  At the Press Conference, Tom said that he chose TSU over TomVille University (TU) based on need in their highly successful … Continue reading

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Now Michele O’TomA has an imaginary son, too

You may remember a few months ago, Barack O’TomA introduced us to his imaginary son who he said would look like TreyTom, pose in gangster pictures, smoke a lot of weed that despite being a carcinogen is no worst than … Continue reading

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Tom takes on 3 epic trash talkers

Demonstrating a fearlessness demonstrated by few other lunatics, Tom has taken on three (3) world-class trash talkers.  He quickly dispensed of Richard Sherman of the Seattle Seahawks and Michael Crabtree of the San Francisco 49ers by pointing that neither were able to … Continue reading

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Chief KnowItAll Costas is back on the warpath

After his ridiculously successful campaign to change the name of the Washington Redskins, Chief Bob “KnowItAll” Costas is opining that he won’t let his son play football. That is fine, he can do what he wants and shut up at … Continue reading

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Sports Illustrated helps lead the way to mainstreaming the sport of tit gazing

Tom, former All-Star and tit gazing Color Commentator, is enthusing about the effort that Sports Illustrated has put into publicizing his favorite sport.  According to Tom, the Kate Upton cover for the Swimsuit edition of Sports Illustrated is sheer genius.  … Continue reading

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A senseless Tom opines on senseless violence

Now that every possible talking head and two-bit politician has thrown down the gun violence gauntlet and Joe Biden has been tasked with solving the problem, Tom is stepping up with his politically incorrect opinions. Everybody agrees that Newtown was … Continue reading

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Badgers go primordial in securing Rose Bowl berth

Merchants and especially Bar owners have been celebrating non-stop since last night when the Wisconsin badgers sewed up a Rose Bowl slot with a sportsmanlike 70-31 victory over the Nebraska Cornhuskers in the Big 10 Championship game. The Badgers skipped old … Continue reading

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Badgers, Packers fall just short of historic Ryder Cup collapse

This past weekend, the University of Wisconsin Badgers and the Green Bay Packers fell just one point short of matching the ineptitude of the  historic USA Ryder cup collapse. The Badgers started strong losing to a mediocre Nebraska Cornhusker team … Continue reading

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Tom calls for the University of Wisconsin to suspend their Football program for the balance of the 2012 season

Tom has joined a chorus of alumni that are calling on University of Wisconsin Athletic officials to suspend the Badger Football program for the balance of the 2012 season. Tom deftly jumped off the Badger bandwagon onto this bandwagon after … Continue reading

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