Tag Archives: Sex Tape

Does Russia have a sex tape of The Donald and Kim KardASSian?

The Intelligence Community in a confidential memo is suggesting that Russia has potentially damaging information On The Donald. Tom has concluded that this could only be that there is a sex tape of The Donald and Kim KardASSian in Russia’s … Continue reading

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Finally Good News: Khloe Kardashian reveals there is a sex tape with Lamar

With all the bad news coming from all corners of the world, Tom was getting desperate for good news. Then came the breathless news that Khloe Kardashian revealed to Andy Cohen on “Watch What Happens Live” that there is a … Continue reading

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Cell Phone calls on airlines. Tom is readfy to rule.

As the FCC, FAA and FOOLS are getting ready to issue smart regulations on cell phone calls on airlines, Tom has announced the definitive regulation namely “calls approved by Tom”. First most calls are totally boring and unnecessary and will … Continue reading

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Kim Jong Eun issues a critical review of Ex’s Sex Tape

Fashion Icon, Hair Stylist to the Stars and North Korean strongman Kim Jong Eun issued a Zero Star rating of his Ex-Girlfriend Hyon Song Wol’s Sex Tape when he had her executed for among other things a sex tape that … Continue reading

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Oprah lands Lindsay Lohan for interview and docu-series

The entertainment world is all a Twitter as word has come out that Oprah Winfrey has scored a sit down interview with our darling Lindsay Lohan followed by an eight-episode docu-series on Oprah’s OWN network on Lindsay rebuilding her career and … Continue reading

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Tom to “rehearse” Lindsay Lohan as “The Canyon” trailer shows some rust in her acting chops

Ever the critic, Tom noticed that after numerous rehabs, Lindsay Lohan demonstrated some rust in her acting chops in the trailer for the much-anticipated new movie “The Canyons”. Tom noted that it has been well over a year since LiLo produced … Continue reading

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Tom introduces new “Bang With Enemies” App

With great fanfare and hints of a new sex tape with Lindsay Lohan when she exits Rehab, Tom rolled out the new  “Bang With Enemies” App.  Since Tom has way more enemies tha  friends, the potential for this App is virtually limitless. While … Continue reading

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Who the hell does Paris Jackson think she is?

What is up with Paris Jackson?  Just because her father may have been the noted Wacko Michael Jackson doesn’t mean that Paris doesn’t need to “wait her turn”.  this young upstart is trying to crash the well-earned publicity from Lindsay Lohan, … Continue reading

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Jessica Simpson: “I am having Tom’s (& everybody else’s) Baby”

Speaking to crack reporters from TomVille tonight an incredibly radiant and juggular Jessica Simpson said “I will be having Tom’s baby”.  She plans to be impregnated by Tom as soon as she delivers the baby she is carrying. Tom is arranging … Continue reading

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