Category Archives: Food and drink

Super Bowl Baby

Is there anything more inane than a local TV News interview with winning fans remote from some bar.  The highlight is some loud mouth with his ball cap on backwards with some hot looking women in the background all yelling … Continue reading

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Major Climate Change Announcement

Trigger Alert/Breaking Fake News Alert/Fake News Alert/Attention:  Climate Media Jetting in from New York City where he pocketed some handsome speaking fees, Al Bore joined The Tom at a Presser of major climate implications.  They breathlessly announced that it rained … Continue reading

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Homeless and Vagrant traffic has been less than Starbucks desired

Local Starbucks Managers report that Homeless and Vagrant traffic has been running below expectations.  Fewer Homeless are taking meetings at their local Starbucks or freshening up in the  restroom. Or perhaps the Homeless would rather take their business to an … Continue reading

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Coachella 2018

The Tom just gently reminds you that Coachella 2018 is still Indio, CA with blistering heat and punishing winds to punctuate your musical experience. The Tom highly recommends that all babes and beauties just but a new hot outfit and … Continue reading

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The Tom’s Thanksgiving message is one we are all thankful for and will unite a divided country

The Tom in his Thanksgiving message assured the world that he would not post a blog on Thanksgiving.  This is news that we can all be thankful for. Further his message is so deep and unexpected that it will unite … Continue reading

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Preempting Adam Schiffless, The Tom bans Russian Rye

Moving at incredible speed, The Tom preempted Rank Member Adam Schiffless and banned Russian Rye before Schiffless could even start one of his innuendo campaigns. Tom said the evidence for the ban had nothing to do with Donald Jr.’s meeting … Continue reading

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Breaking News: The Tom’s involvement with Russians confirmed

TNN (TomVille News Network) has just learned from unnamed sources that the Intelligence community has proof of Tom’s involvement with the Russians.  Surely this is the smoking gun that will sink the buoyant Tom.  Rank Member Adam Schiffless said he … Continue reading

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Tiger Woody: Tom organizes an emergency Intervention

When Tom heard that Tiger Woody had been pulled over for suspicion of DUI, The Tom knew immediately that he needed to spring into action to organize an Intervention. Some my remember the Intervention Tom organized when Tiger developed a … Continue reading

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Kylie Jenner looks devastated

After all the haters came out of the woodwork to blast poor Kendall Jenner’s Pepsi commercial, Kylie Jenner looked absolutely positively devastated.

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Tom demonstrates an incredible feat of strength

While others may lose strength with age, Tom is proving to be the exception that proves the rule.  There was a time a few years ago when Tom struggled to bring in $200 worth of groceries.  Just the other day … Continue reading

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