Monthly Archives: February 2015

Movie Mogul Tom orders unlimited sequels of “50 Shades of Green”

Posted on February 26, 2015 by tom

Speaking in a trench coat in the back row of a darkened XXX theatre in the San Fernando Valley, Tom informed the crowd that he has ordered the production of unlimited sequels of “50 Shades of Green”.  A morally ambivalent … Continue reading →

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Tom tires of adulation at Oscars, Not

Posted on February 23, 2015 by tom

As Tom strolled the Red Carpet decked out in the latest fashions at the Academy Awards, he was inundated by investigative reporters from TomVille Tonight, Access TomVille and Inside TomVille, plus the morning shows Good Morning TomVille, Kelly and Tom … Continue reading →

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Kim Tom Un takes air out of N.Y. Fashion Week with a new look

Posted on February 19, 2015 by tom

Leave it to North Korea’s man of the people Kim Tom Un to take all the buzz with a new fashion forward Wedgie Pompadour and a daring new eyebrowcut. The man is still the king of fashion.

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Joe Biden gets his creep on with Defense Secretary’s Wife

Posted on February 19, 2015 by tom

Why is Barack O’TomA silent in the matter of Joe Biden noodling the new Defense Secretary’s wife?  If Biden was a Republican he would be accused of waging a war on women or worse. But we know that old Joe … Continue reading →

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Tom introduces his new “50 Shades of Gray” clothing line

Posted on February 15, 2015 by tom

It should not come as too much of a surprise that Tom’s “50 Shades of Gray” clothing line does not include any actual clothing.  Tom is merely making the strong suggestion that women send their money to Tom.  In turn, … Continue reading →

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The Morning Chubby

Posted on February 14, 2015 by tom

Public Service Announcement for afficionados of the rubenesque female form in all its glory. The following blog is a gold mine.

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Tom comes out swinging against Brian Williams haters and then grants himself a Leave of Absence

Posted on February 9, 2015 by tom

Just minutes before announcing that he has given himself a Leave of Absence, Tom came out swinging against a legion of Brian Williams haters.  These haters are deadenders from the Katie Couric days. What, Tom asks, is more American than … Continue reading →

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New Math: Free = $60 Billion

Posted on February 8, 2015 by tom

Proving that a Harvard education is never waster, Barack O’TomA introduced new math concepts to common core.  His Free Community College” proposal cost $60 billion.  Please solve this equation where X = Bull S***, and show your work.  

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Brian Williams and Hillary Rodman Clinton to solve “Boots on the Ground” dilemma

Posted on February 6, 2015 by tom

So NBC News Reader Brian Williams has joined “All But Elected” President Hillary Rodman Clinton in re-imagining his war-time bravery.  Clinton as you may recall took “withering” fire from non existent guns on the tarmac in Bosnia in 1996.  Now … Continue reading →

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“Tom presents Katy Perry” at the Super Bowl. The ratings don’t lie

Posted on February 4, 2015 by tom

Now that Super Bowl 49 ratings are in, we have confirmation of what we have always known.  The Super Bowl drew just North of 112 million viewers.  The Katy Perry Half Time show  featuring Tom as the Left Shark had … Continue reading →

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