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Monthly Archives: January 2018
Tom slays Gender Inequality problem
Leave it to Tom to solve big problems with little meaningless gesturers. Last night, The Tom solved any ad all gender inequality problems by wearing a white rose. “The Tom is so Authentic”, whispered his fan/mom.
Posted in Entertainment, humor, News and politics, Organizations
Tagged Donald J. Trump, Gender Inequality, Grammys, White Rose
2 Comments
BREAKING NEWS: Nine months ago, The Tom did not fire The Mueller
Yesterday I was treated to Breaking News which was a story that 9 months ago The Donald didn’t fire The Mueller on the advice of his Attorney. How can a non story from 9 months ago be declared Breaking News. … Continue reading
Posted in humor, News and politics, Organizations
Tagged Donald J. Trump, Mark Zuckerberg, Robert Mueller
2 Comments
Tom breaks Popper Joggers fashion news
Tom has learned exclusively that Kylie Jenner will be introducing a line of “Popper Jogger Tops”. “The ease and speed of the Popper Jogger Top are amazing. Just pop the top and you are admiring my surgically perfected Double DDs.” … Continue reading
Posted in Entertainment, Fashion, humor, News and politics, Organizations, Uncategorized
Tagged Bella Hadid, Kylie Jenner, Popper Joggers
2 Comments
Dumb Truck
No, the Headline is not a typo where the magnificent The Hill reams The Tom a new one. But rather it is from a commercial flooding the airways in the Democratic Peoples’ Republic of California that asks “Is your truck … Continue reading
CA battles agains itself in Secondhand Smoke wars
Nightly the residents of the Democratic Peoples’ Republic of California are bombarded by commercials about the dangers of secondhand tobacco smoke and how it even penetrates walls. At the same time the State sponsored Marijuana is all over the news … Continue reading
Posted in Health and wellness, humor, News and politics, Organizations
Tagged California, Cannabis, marijuana, Secondhand Smoke
2 Comments
Forces loyal to Mueller and Clinton rolling into Hellflower says Tom Times*
Forces loyal to Special Prosecutor Robert Mueller and sore loser Hillary Rodman Clinton are rolling out of the Democratic Peoples’ Republic of California and have entered Hellflower destined to arrest The Tom in Tom Tower in the heart of TomVille. … Continue reading
The Tom ridicules Kim KardASShian’s children’s names
The Tom Northeast Southwestern Hellflower Tommy Thomas says who besides Kayne West and Kim KardASShian West would name their children North, Saint and Chicago? Michael Jackson must be rolling in his grave wondering why they did not use some solid … Continue reading
Posted in Entertainment, News and politics, Organizations
Tagged Kayne West, Kim Kardashian
Comments Off on The Tom ridicules Kim KardASShian’s children’s names
Harvey Whinestein presents Bikini Wars
Reinventing himself as a man of good tastes, a frisky and rehabilitated Harvey Whinestein has organized Bikini Wars. In the first match, we have the newcomer Kylie Jenner going directly against an Old School Lindsay Lohan. This event culminates … Continue reading
Posted in Entertainment, humor, News and politics, Organizations, Sports
Tagged Bikini, Dick Enberg, Harvey Weinstein, Kylie Jenner, Lindsay Lohan
Comments Off on Harvey Whinestein presents Bikini Wars
“Swearing is good for you” by Dr. Emma Byrne
The Tom has assigned this article to that F–ing A**hole Dick Durbin (D-IL) https://www.thecut.com/2017/12/the-psychological-benefits-of-swearing.html
Posted in Entertainment, Health and wellness, humor, News and politics, Organizations, Uncategorized
Tagged Dick Durbin, Donald J. Trump, Emma Byrne
2 Comments