Monthly Archives: September 2013

Tom threatens to shut down the Government

Appearing on all 124 Sunday Morning political shows, Tom threatened to shut down the Government.  Tom was flanked by Teddy “Cruisers” Cruz and the infamous ever evil Koch brothers when he called out POTUS Barack O’TomA for refusing to negotiate on … Continue reading

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Power + Money = Hot

Like Barack and Hasan, Tom thinks that German Chancellor Angela Merkel is so hot.  She has world leaders and the EU eating out of her hand.  Her pant suits are bursting with power. But going back to 2008 or so,there … Continue reading

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In confusion over the CR and Government Shutdown, Tom slips in a huge grant

Taking advantage of the confusion and short time frame over the Continuing Resolution (CR) and threats to shut down the Government, Tom has had his operatives slip in a grant (to Tom) of $100 Billion.  Tom is fairly confident that … Continue reading

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Barack and Iran’s Hasan Rouhani like giddy school girls talk on phone

Yesterday the top news was that Barack O’Toma and Iranian President Hassan Rouhani spoke on the phone.  The Press was relentless in reporting the call. Tom has exclusively learned that Barack and Hasan both think that Heather is a tramp, … Continue reading

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Tom almost has a nervous breakdown hearing that Oprah almost had a nervous breakdown

Tom was laid low by the TMI that Oprah Winfrey almost had a nervous breakdown in the midst of publicizing her network and movie projects. This caught Tom right in the middle of over-promoting his latest film classic “Lee Tom … Continue reading

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Occupy Wall Street Tom salutes the 1% and Larry Ellison on America’s Cup Victory

Thru clenched teeth, Tom doffed his hat to the 1% on their Victory in the America Cup Sailing race.  We have always loved Larry Ellison and Oracle  . M  O  N  E  Y

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Somebody needs a Hug

After a few bad days in Afghanistan, North Korea, Iraq, Libia, Egypt, Kenya and Syria, Barack O’TomA was looking forward to a photo-op handshake with new Iranian President Hasan Rouhani yesterday at a UN meeting.  Rouhani snubbed Barack and turned … Continue reading

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Nobel Peace Prize Winner to Tom (Loser): I won’t negotiate

Fresh from highly successful negotiations with North Korea, Taliban, Iraq, Russia, Iran, Libia, Egypt and Syria,  Nobel Peace Prize Winner Barack O’TomA hit the campaign trail to publically tell Tom (Nobel Peace Prize Loser) that he won’t negotiate on funding the … Continue reading

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Tom warns Barack not to “mess with him”

With Barack O’TomA in a highly agitated, political state after a House vote to de-fund his signature program, Tom issued a preemptive warning to Barack not to “mess with him” Barack has been known to pillage Tom even more viciously … Continue reading

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Tom withdraws from consideration for Federal Reserve Chairman

Tom announced today that he is withdrawing his name for consideration to be the next Fed Chair replacing Ben Bernanke. As he withdrew, Tom quashed an ugly rumor that he can’t even balance his own checkbook.  While admitting he often … Continue reading

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