Monthly Archives: April 2012

Tom tied with Pujols in Home Run Derby at end of April

As we enter the second month of the baseball season, tom is still tied with Albert Pujols in the Home Run Derby with zero each. You will remember Tom a former HS JV Baseball bench-warmer seemed to come out of … Continue reading

Posted in Entertainment, News and politics, Organizations, Sports | Tagged , , , , , ,

OctoMom back in News as Tom wonders where is the love for OctoDads

Octomom Nadya Suleman is back in the news allegedly living in squalor with her 14 kids and getting ready for another foreclosure. By the way who keeps floating home loans to this woman? But sadly for Octomom a Mexican woman … Continue reading

Posted in Entertainment, Health and wellness, News and politics, Sports | Tagged , , , , , ,

WH Vegetable Gardner blasts critics of Taxpayers funded $467,585 vacation in Spain

Emerging sweaty and in bib overalls armed with a short handle hoe, a humble White House Vegetable Gardner Michelle O’TomA put her Taxpayer funded $467,585 vacation in Spain right in its proper perspective. She told the assembled media to back … Continue reading

Posted in Entertainment, Food and drink, Health and wellness, News and politics | Tagged , , , | 2 Comments

Metta World Conflict brings peace to the NBA

Metta World Conflict formerly known as Tom Arrest was suspended by the NBA for 7 games for giving excessive and lengthy bear hugs to opposing players. And in a new peace ritual after scoring a basket, he gently nudges the … Continue reading

Posted in Entertainment, News and politics, Organizations, Sports | Tagged , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

Mitt Tomney barks “Why didn’t I get the memo that women don’t like rich handsome guys anymore?”

Campaign aides are keeping their heads down as Mitt Tomney digests the fact that women stopped liking rich handsome guys in early November 2008. Tomney is demanding to know why he didn’t get the memo, who wrote the memo and … Continue reading

Posted in Entertainment, News and politics | Tagged , , , , | 2 Comments

Barack O’TomA announces new GSA Party Planning and Secret Service Security Guard offerings

In a major address from the Oval Office, Barack O’TomA announced new Government services designed to bring in more than sufficient income to close the $15 Trillion federal debt. The announcement was covered by all broadcast outlets, YouTube, Twitter, Facebook … Continue reading

Posted in Entertainment, Fashion, Food and drink, News and politics, Organizations | Tagged , , , , | 2 Comments

Barack O’TomA shakes up the clubby World of Mathematicians

In a stunning display of the new world order in mathematics, Barack O’TomA introduced a new math concept that is bound to change everything that we have always believed. He has immediately gone to the head of the math class … Continue reading

Posted in Entertainment, News and politics | Tagged , , | 2 Comments

Tom joins “Giving Pledge”

Lulled into a state of nirvana by the “Giving Pledge” started by Bill Gates and Warren Buffett as a way to give away wealth and get maximum credit and publicity, Tom took the Pledge. Recent rich guys jumping on the … Continue reading

Posted in Entertainment, News and politics | Tagged , , , | 2 Comments

Justice for Tom ?

The Sunday Morning Talk Shows were all over the Justice for Tom? story. You may recall that Tom was moonlighting as a self-appointed Neighbor Watch Captain for the Fashion Police with primary responsibility for guarding the TomVille Brothel run by … Continue reading

Posted in Entertainment, Fashion, News and politics, Organizations | Tagged , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

Tom readies Missile purchased on eBay from No. Korea

In a major coup, Tom was able to purchase a missile (ICBM) on eBay from Kim Jung Eun of North Korea. Prior to this purchase TomVille was tied with NASA in the number of functional rockets with each having zero. … Continue reading

Posted in Entertainment, Fashion, News and politics | Tagged , , , , ,