Monthly Archives: March 2012

Like Barack O’TomA, Tom crackles at “Open Mic” contest

Last week after a round of drinking, Tom met Dimitry (President, Prime Minister, Spin Doctor) for an “Open Mic” contest after hearing the success that rival Barack O’TomA had during his appearance. While a little difficult to understand, the transcript … Continue reading

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Tom envies Barack O’TomA’s O’Bomber Jacket

As the images of Barack O’TomA rolled off the presses and the internet wearing a cool Bomber jacket surveying the Korean DMZ with huge binoculars, Tom was reminded of General Patton and his fruitless quest for a similar jacket. Tom … Continue reading

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Dick Cheney rejects Tom’s heart as too cold for transplant

Poor former Vice-President Dick Cheney had to accept a bleeding heart liberal heart for his transplant when Tom’s heart was offered and rejected as even too cold for even Dick Cheney. Nobody who knows Tom was surprised as he may … Continue reading

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Is there another Beer Summit in Baby Daddy Barack O’TomA’s future?

Bypassing the obligatory DNA test on the Maury Show, Constitutional Scholar and possibleBaby¬† Daddy Barack O’TomA hinted that Trayvon Martin maybe his son. Then he jumped on the train with Al Sharpton in control. But not so fast, noted investigative … Continue reading

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Tom emulates Zynga to solve writer’s and creativity blocks

Veteran Tom observers have noticed a recent writer’s block and a creativity block that pre-dates this Blog. Eschewing original thinking, Tom quickly latched upon the model of Zynga whose FarmVille and CityVille games were the inspiration for the cheap knockoff … Continue reading

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Wisconsin BADgers set the bar for close losses in big games

After falling to the Oregon Ducks in the 2012 Rose Bowl presented by Vizio 45-38 in the last seconds, the Wisconsin BADgers went out to prove that this was no fluke as they lost in the NCAA Basketball Sweet 16 … Continue reading

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Tom introduces the iBlog

As Apple’s stock has soared past $600 per share, Tom sensed a rare opportunity to bring his flare for classic design and his love of money to satisfy customer needs. The stage was set at the TomVille Jr. High Auditorium … Continue reading

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Rank This, Glory to Google in the Highest

Today Tom announced his new Blog Certification program with the following guarantees: Blog content worthless and of no value = All Content with redeeming social value = None Content and comments meant to feed Tom’s insatiable ego = All Potential … Continue reading

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Badgers bust Brackets as they lumber into the Sweet (sweat) 16

The SloMo Wisconsin Badgers have taken a wobbly #4 seed to shock the mighty Montana Grizzlies 73-49 followed by a surprise 60-57 pasting of the Vanderbilt (sounds like beautiful money) Commodores 60-57 to crash the NCAA Tournament Sweet 16. The … Continue reading

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Barack O’TomA announces his Brackets

Noted Bracketologist Barack O’TomA announced his Brackets yesterday to a fawning Press Corp. In the Final 4, he has Syria, Taliban, Iran and North Korea. Iran outlasts the Taliban in Overtime to win the Championship. BREAKING NEWS: O’TomA reveals the … Continue reading

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