Category Archives: Uncategorized

The Tom announced as Tragic Johnson’s new agent

The Tom scored a major coup when he inked Tragic Johnson as his newest client.  The deal includes exclusive negotiating rights for positions in Basketball Administration, Basketball Coaching and Late Night Talk Shows. “Tragic Johnson is a proven performer in … Continue reading

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Tiger Woody is Back

In Breaking News, The Tom announced that with his 2019 Masters victory that Tiger Woody is Back. The Tom has notified Rachel Uchitel and other Groupies. “Tiger, I got the Wing” roared The Tom. “Let’s Roll.  I have been waiting … Continue reading

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The Tom declares himself an Influencer

In a master marketing stroke, The Tom announced that he is now an Influencer and that the bidding starts at $1 Million. If you wish to reach non-beautiful people who don’t smell that great, The Tom is the Influencer of … Continue reading

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Lakers agree to partial shutdown of King LaTom James

With Tragic Johnson of the LA Lakers desperate to draw attention away from the $154 Million 4 year contract with the King, the Lakers agreed to limit his minutes to about half time.  This enables LaTom to draw his outrageous … Continue reading

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The Tom welcomes Kylie Jenner as the youngest member of Billionaires Club

The Tom rushed to congratulate Kylie as the newest and youngest member of the Billionaire Club. After a hard day at the office, Kylie enjoys some well deserved relaxation. The Tom is anxious to reach out to Kylie for consulting … Continue reading

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Did LaTom James pull a fast one on Tragic Johnson?

While a middling real estate developer, Tragic Johnson is a disaster as a sports executive. Prior to his most recent incarnation with the Lakers, he was an interim Coach with the Lakers and failed miserably. Fast forward to now and … Continue reading

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Media Alert: The Tom will predict Super Bowl winner

At exactly 7:12 p.m. PST on February 3, 2019, The Tom will predict the winner of Super Bowl LIV (or is it LIII ?) “It is a Lock Baby” boasts The Tom. AT the precise time, The Tom speaks “Patriots … Continue reading

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The Tom announces IPO for Polar Vortex

Ever the advocate of Climate Change, The Tom announces that he has opened an Initial Public Offering (IPO) for Polar Vortex at an initial price point of $1,000 per share. Polar Vortex shares can only be used to combat Climate … Continue reading

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Empty Suit makes Major announcement

In what he billed as a major announcement, Empty Suit Eric Garcetti declared that he was not a candidate for President.  He seemed to throw his support to the next empty suit, Kamala Harris. Evidently , somebody whispered to the … Continue reading

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Super Bowl Baby

Is there anything more inane than a local TV News interview with winning fans remote from some bar.  The highlight is some loud mouth with his ball cap on backwards with some hot looking women in the background all yelling … Continue reading

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