Monthly Archives: December 2017

The Tom pushes back on Global Cooling Deniers

Posted on December 29, 2017 by tom

Speaking in shirtsleeves from a deserted Lambeau field in Green Bay. Wisconsin, The Tom blasted the flat-earth Global Cooling Deniers.  123 Nations have pulled out of the Nome Protocol on Global Cooling. It is all in the science as The … Continue reading →

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The Tom says we may have critical mass for California to secede from the union

Posted on December 26, 2017 by tom

The Tom has long admired California as a Progressive bastion and his cold heart melted when Hilary Rodman Clinton garnered 2/3 of the vote.  But now may be the perfect moment in time for California to secede from the union. … Continue reading →

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Kim Jong Un holds The Tom and the free world hostage over haircut secrets

Posted on December 20, 2017 by tom

Dear Leader and Barber extraordinaire Kim Jong Un has threatened The Tom and the free world as  nuclear hostages until they reveal the haircutting secrets of LaVar/LaTom Ball and his sons LaMelo and LiAngelo. This may be difficult to negotiate … Continue reading →

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How did they know that The Tom was celebrating on the yacht?

Posted on December 20, 2017 by tom

How did Senators Elizabeth Warren and Chuckie Schumer know that The Tom was watching C-SPAN on his yacht while the Tax Cut legislation was going thru the grinder  And how did they know that The Tom was celebrating by sipping … Continue reading →

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Tom’s Holiday Gift Guide for the men in your life

Posted on December 15, 2017 by tom

Promising to take the hassle and confusion on the perfect gift for the men in your life, Tom unveiled his First Annual Gift Guide.  The top 4 gifts for this year are as follows: An Initial Defense Lawyer Consultation with … Continue reading →

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Tom reports a lack of sexual harassment

Posted on December 8, 2017 by tom

In conversations with his lawyer and the media, Tom reports a lack of sexual harassment directed towards him.  Regrettably, Tom says that he has not been groped, been subject to a lingering hug, pinched on the butt,  been subject to … Continue reading →

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TommySue takes lead in huge sexual harassment allegations and suit against Oedipus the King

Posted on December 7, 2017 by tom

First daughter Busty TommySue is spearheading a massive sexual harassment suit involving billions of women who have made sexual harassment allegation against Oedipus the King.  TommySue says that she may be contacted via Twitter at #stopOeipus While it may be … Continue reading →

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Tom edged out for Time Person of the Year by a Hashtag

Posted on December 6, 2017 by tom

In his worst humiliation to date, The Tom lost out on being Time magazine’s Person of the Year by a Hashtag formerly known as #MeToo.  A Fake News investigation has been opened to be headed by a suddenly unemployed Robert … Continue reading →

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