Monthly Archives: January 2013

Tom admits he lip-synched National Anthem

Today to a throng of admiring entertainment reporters, Tom admitted that at the Inauguration, hee sang the National Anthem to a back-up recording by Beyoncé Knowles.   This is not lip-synching if it is done by a major recording star. Tom said that … Continue reading

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With Ron Jeremy hospitalized, the Industry reaches out to Tom

With news that Ron Jeremy was hospitalized in critical condition with  an aneurysm, the erotic Industry reached out to Tom to return to action.  Most observers feel that this would be the only way to save the Industry in a time … Continue reading

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Tom takes an option to re-make “Movie 43”

Despite rather savage reviews of “Movie 43” including: “A star-studded turkey”, “Citizen Kane of Awful”, “Aggressively tasteless” and “Zero out of 4 Stars”, Tom jumped at the opportunity to do a re-make because of his flair for tasteless and star … Continue reading

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L. Tom Hubbard is still alive and living in TomVille

Today, we have confirmation that L. Tom Hubbard noted adventurer, sea-captain, military hero, prolific screenwriter, author and founder of the Church of Unscientology is alive and living on a hilltop estate in Southern TomVille.  He joins other distinguished residents spotted including Adolph … Continue reading

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Is the Administration of Tom the Terrible already in shambles?

As we enter the second day of the Tom the Terrible Administration, rumors have it that Tom the Terrible is already in trouble.  The Secretaries of Labor, Defense, State, Interior, Treasury, Transportation, Defense, and Energy have indicated they are leaving … Continue reading

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King Tom I toppled by Tom the Terrible

After a brutal 3 day Coronation event marked by Beyoncé accusing him of lip-synching the TomVille Anthem and  others accusing him of lip-synching the Coronation Address that was actually delivered fresh off the teleprompter bitter rival Barack O’TomA, Tom was … Continue reading

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Beyonce accuses King Tom I of lip-synching Anthem at Coronation

In a rare rebuke to King Tom I of TomVille, Beyoncé Knowles has accused King Tom I of lip-synching the TomVille anthem at his own Coronation.  Tom sang his own Anthem to  both show his frugality and to score an audition … Continue reading

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King Tom I vetoes Inauguration bill to taxpayers

In his first official act since his Coronation, King Tom I has turned down the $100 Million bill to the taxpayers for the Inauguration submitted by his old rival Barack O’TomA. Tom roared from the “Throne”  that the Middle Class … Continue reading

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Brilliant counterprogramming: TomVille State TV schedules Tom’s Coronation against the Inaururation of Barack O’TomA and/or Hugo Chavez

In a bold move TomVille State TV has broken away from wall-to-wall coverage of Chelsea Clinton’s National Day of Service photo ops to cover Tom’s Coronation.  Crack reporters from TomVille Tonight, Access TomVille, Good Morning TomVille and OMG Outsider will cover … Continue reading

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The most exhaustive search in the history of mankind turns up who???

With virtually unlimited resources and casting a worldwide net for the most experienced and credentialed investigative journalists, NBC’s Rock (rocks in their head) Center with Brian Williams turned up who as a recurring correspondent ???? MSN.com searched the entire country for … Continue reading

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