In a Rose Garden Ceremony, Barack O’TomA appointed Tom to the newly formed and prestigious Federal Uncensored Censored Knowledge agency. The Agency Commissioners are Tom, Bob Costas, V. Stiviano and Barack O’TomA. The Agency will report directly to Joe Biden.
The first order of business for the Agency is to develop smart Regulations. Consequently all speech uttered by any protected group will be deemed acceptable. If you have ever written a big check to a LGBT group or want to hear more about the courage of Michael Sam, you are exempt. Furthermore if you have ever watched MSNBC for more than 3 minutes you are exempt.
In order tp fulfill the mission, the Agency will have to collect all speech written, oral or electronic and file it in a NSA database in order t connect the dots. A copy of all information in the database will be forwarded weekly to Harvey Levin at TMZ
First up are the cases of Alec Baldwin, Brad Ausmus, Donald Sterling, Daniel Snyder and Kobe Bryant.
“I think we have taken care of the 1st amendment/Free Speech unauthorized speech issues and honed in like a laser on those who have watched Fox News.”, intoned Tom.